Why I'm a Doula
Love is the foundation upon which a positive birth begins
All my life I’ve been a carer and nurturer. So in a way I think becoming a doula was my destiny. Being a birth keeper just makes my heart sing.
How I Got Started
Four or five years ago, after having my children and helping my husband set up our family business, I decided it was time to follow my heart’s calling. I started looking for a course that would help me become the best doula I could be. I didn’t want a quick course. I wanted to become a full-spectrum doula, so for me the course had to turn over every rock to help me understand how best to support and guide my clients.
The course I chose was comprehensive and drew on the knowledge and experience of a range of brilliant practitioners. We covered an extensive range of topics, including birth as a somatic[i] practice, breastfeeding, massage and acupressure, and baby wearing. Of course, we also did a deep dive with Evidence Based birth.
Once my initial course was completed I went on to study Spinning Babies, and learn about Optimal Maternal Positioning. I studied baby massage and bodywork with Jenny Blythe. To ensure I had the skills and knowledge to provide nutritional support I did the Milk & Seed Medicinal Kitchen and Little Yarrow Botanical Medicine courses.
The depth and breadth of this course was incredible, and I am grateful to have been able to receive what I consider the best doula training in the world.
My Philosophy
The training I have done, along with my own birth experiences, has allowed me to develop a strong sense of who I am as a doula, and what I can offer women and their partners during the pregnancy, birth and postpartum period. If I had to sum my approach up in three words it would be gentle, nurturing, and holistic.
Pregnancy – is a time where my role as a doula is to gently coach, educate and support women and their partners both mentally and emotionally. It is also the time to prepare the body for birth by staying fit and healthy.
Birth – Birth is a normal and natural process. Our bodies were perfectly designed for the task. Often the medical and hospital system don’t allow for those natural processes, and how we are treated while birthing can have an effect long after the baby arrives. It is my role to help ensure mothers feel safe in the birthing experience.
Postpartum – Ahh, being with women postpartum is my favourite part of my role as a doula. Sadly, our modern lives haven’t allowed us to experience a slow postpartum where we honour the huge transition from maiden to mother. This is the time mothers need a woman to hold sacred space, and to nourish and replenish their tired bodies with healing foods, massage and comfort. It is important to normalise how we talk about postpartum, and the need for comfort, care and support. Women don’t need expensive prams, they need the care of a doula to not just survive, but to thrive in this magical period.
My Advice
Pregnant women and new parents are bombarded with advice, whether they ask for it or not. Even the most well-meaning advice can be unhelpful, particularly if it doesn’t sit well with the beliefs of the new parents. Whilst listening to advice can be confusing, educating yourself on your choices and coming to an understanding of how you want your experience to be will help you feel empowered and centred, and help you learn to trust your own instincts.
This is a time when trust is vital, which is why having an honest connection and understanding with my clients is so important. If I don’t feel we have the right fit I will refer a client on to someone in my doula network who I think will be a better match.
Every woman is different, every birth is different, every family is different, and I adjust my support and guidance to suit.
One piece of advice that is universal, though, is you can never have too much support. Take it slow, give yourself the time for self-care, and don’t ever feel like you need to compare yourself to others.
Oh, and you can never spoil a baby with too many cuddles!
What I Love Most
Whilst I absolutely love watching a woman or birthing person unravel and transform before my eyes into a mother, one of my favourite things is to see the changes in men as they become dads. The new generation of dads are just awesome. Gone are the days when caring for bub was left to the mum. Dads are now stepping up. Watching men get all soft and mushy, wearing their baby and having skin-to-skin time is just so heartwarming.
No two days are the same for a doula, but at the end of the day I love going to bed with a full heart, knowing the positive impact I have had on the parents and babies I work with.
I recently saw a quote. I have no idea who said this, but for me it sums up how I feel about my role as a doula:
I think of myself as a binding that holds the book together, while working through each chapter with you. You are the one turning the pages over and becoming invested in the story, YOUR story, and not handing the book to anyone else. You are owning your book, owning your story and owning your power.
If you would like to chat about how I can support you on your journey from maiden to mother, please give me a call on 0422 258 771 or contact me:
[i] Somatic – relating to the body as distinct from the mind